Here are a list of questions that I get asked often.
Are you actually an elf?
Don’t be absurd! Elves don’t exist. I’m just a human with funny ears. They do nothing but get in the way and look nice. Why do you normal people have more convenient ears?
OMG, Can I touch your ears?
I don’t like the sound people make when they touch my sensitive ears. The sound of blood gushing from the cuts on their fingers, and the horrified screams. *shudder*
Can you write for me? I won’t pay you but you’ll get a lot of exposure!
If you’re good at something, never do it for free – Joker
How do you write your Articles?
With great skill.
It’s a trade secret
Professionals have standards – Sniper (Team Fortress 2)
I just wrote a List Article, can you please read through it?
I hate list articles, especially clickbaity ones.
Composing lists is NOT the only way to write decent articles.
What’s your sex?
Yes please. I’ll just sit here and be entertained by watching you trying to figure it out. Females don’t actually have penises. You shouldn’t believe everything on the internet.
We’re not Spotted Hyenas, yo.
Wait, it’s a guy?!
I’m not even sure about that, I think I drew my avatar a bit too effeminate. Well, I think I’ll leave it up to your imagination.